Episode 36: The Accessible Stall and Ellen Seidman - The Accessible Stall

We have wanted to talk about disability and parents on this show for a long time. Specifically, the dynamic between an able-bodied parent and a disabled child. There were just two small problems: We are not parents, and we are disabled. Therefore, we had to bring in someone who knows that dynamic first-hand. The internet has tons of blogs written by parents of children with disabilities, but very few get the official Accessible Stall seal of approval. So, in this episode, we sat down with Ellen Seidman, the author of Love That Max. Enjoy!

Who is Ellen Seidman?

Ellen Seidman runs the popular disability “mom blog” called Love That Max. She started this blog in 2008 and has been keeping it up to date since then. Aside from the fact that that’s an accomplishment in itself, she talks about her son Max who has cerebral palsy. She’s also super fun to talk with and an amazing podcast guest!

Why have a parent on the show?

We’ve talked about groupthink and defining ourselves as a community before to break down what it means to be “in” the disability community. Part of the reason we do this show is to bridge gaps by having honest conversations. Right now, there’s a huge gap between parents of people with disabilities, and people with disabilities ourselves. We thought this conversation needed to happen in order for everyone to learn from each other. Plus, hearing Ellen’s journey of learning about disability through her son is just plain cool. We get into some of the uglier parts of disability in this episode too, which is something we think is not talked about often enough.

This Ellen Seidman person sounds cool, where can I find her?

You can find Ellen at the links above, as well as on Facebook here, and on Twitter here.

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Episode 35: Acquiring Disability and Hearing Aids - The Accessible Stall

In this episode, we talk about acquiring disability. Even though we have had ours from birth, acquiring disability can still affect us. For example, our reasoning for making this episode was that Emily recently figured out she needed hearing aids. Although hearing aids are just another piece of assistive technology, Emily’s first day with them made us think: If acquiring disability is this challenging for someone born with another one, what would it feel like to have lived a non-disabled life and be thrust into having a disability? We discuss that and more in this episode. We hope you enjoy it!

Please note: In the episode, Emily says she has “profound” hearing loss, but this is not technically correct. Her hearing loss is significant, though.

Acquiring disability

We’ve talked about access before on this show. We’ve talked about disability on this show (obviously!) But, we both don’t know what it’s like to have your first disability be one that you’ve acquired, or what it’s like to have your access suddenly limited or changed. However, Emily recently getting hearing aids due to hearing loss gave us a glimpse into what that might be like. We recorded this episode on the first day Emily had her new hearing aids. She did not like them. But if it takes so long to become comfortable with an acquired disability when you already have a disability, it must be a challenge to acquire your first one late in life. That isn’t to say there aren’t exceptions. But Emily’s “day 1” struggle was real.

Above all else, what this episode really taught us was that change takes time. And that’s okay. Acceptance doesn’t happen overnight. In Emily’s example, the hearing aids were “an attack on [her] senses”.

It made us realize that being “born this way” helped us deal with acceptance because we simply had to from the minute we were born. This is different from self-acceptance, which we also touch on. But our lives never vastly changed overnight like they can when you acquire disability. And we realized that in a very roundabout way we were grateful for being “born this way.”

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